Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Mischa got her (Fashion!) groove back

OHMYGOSH! - I've been inspired!
It looks like after months of dressing like this...

(Ewww - is that a slight hint of a camels toe we see? I think sooo! Astagfirullah! She obviously didnt look in the mirror before leaving her house that day...)

(Leggings teamed with a butt skimming top and butch manly boots? NEVER a good look lady...)

Mischa finally got her groove back! And boy has she got it back gooooood?!!
She looks amazing and her dresses below are stunning - I WANT!!! Anyone know who they're by?!
I'm especially loving the shape of the below dress, so much so, that I'm thinking I might see if I can get my tailor to make me up something like this... (Its a bit snug but we can get Mr tailor to loosen it out some, right ladies - Whaddya think?!

And this black one toooo! (Below!)
I have one quite similar to it in jersey though its very simple I feel it looks really plain when I'll wear it... The one Mishchas wearing is lovely with the gorgeous gold detail on the neck though I think if iI was to customise my dress, my hijab would cover it all up anyways... Hmmm... Its still inspired me enough to wear it already (its been sitting in my closet for months!)

I have a shopping urge coming on girlies!
Hope your all well insh'Allah sisters,
Stay blessed until next time...

Monday, 27 April 2009

Todays thoughts...

She had a soul – she had life breathed into her. She was breathing- She was living and soon to enter from her world into ours…

Today she is being shrouded and being buried at the foot of her beautiful older brother who passed away aged just 4 years.

Asalaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu Sisters,

I feel so horrendous today, I feel very subdued and in a very deep and contemplative mood.

I was given the news that a very close relative who was due to give birth in 8 weeks time very sadly, by Allah’s will, suffered from a miscarriage last night.

I’m left feeling deeply saddened for the mother as 5 short years ago she had to endure the loss of her 4 year old son. I can’t even begin to imagine how she must be feeling… What must be going through her head? What must she be feeling? Not being a mother myself; I can’t even begin to understand this…

I can’t help but think if it was me in this situation God forbid, – I’d be left thinking all sorts, blaming myself, my body, past sins and such 'bad luck'...

Of course luck has nothing to do with it as this was the decree, the qadar - of Allah but…?.... *sighs* I don’t know… Surely that's what you would naturally feel - right? Or wrong….?

Maybe it was Allah’s way of saving her from pain and troubles of what may have been an ill child? A child who would have been best to neot ebeter this world? Gosh...Who knows...

I just feel so bad... I know its sooo easy for me to say, but I really do pray she is given strength and sabr in this testing time for her Insh'Allah... She has suffered much hardship and after harship comes ease (Surah Al Inshirah - 94:5-6)

Mu’adh b. Jabal reported on the authority of Allah’s Messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) who said "By him in whose Hand is my life, the miscarried foetus will drag his mother towards the paradise, with his navel string if she had shown the patience for the sake of reward from Allah."

Abu Huraira reported that Allah’s Messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) said "The miscarried foetus that I send before me is dearer to me than a rider whom I leave behind." [Ibn Majah]

Subhanallah - the blessings of a mother whom has suffers such loss...

Gosh I feel so insensitive – it was just last week I was texting her about it and gushing about the good news… I feel awful. I’m quite worried for her actually… and as always will keep her in my duas, even more so now…

I’m sorry for the distressing post ladies, just something I had to get out...
= (

Have a blessed day Sisters,

Fi Amanillah

Thursday, 23 April 2009

Quick thought...

On route to plush Lebanese restaurant Noura, I can't help but notice all the flesh I see... Tanned thighs...full bust...toned shoulders

Astagfirullah... Honestly, I'm speechless... I can't help but think about the reasons why these women feel to dress like this...!!!

The social dilemmas that surround us... What a world we live in...

-- Posted From My iPhone --

Saturday, 18 April 2009

Sooooo, What was the delay?

Asalaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuhu beautiful readers...

Ok so I was cleaning out my beloved iPhone of all the ‘’iStuff’’ I’ve managed to store on it over the past months and come across a little something I thought I'd share...

It’s often used for me to tap into my emotions when I’m trying to work out exactly what it is I’m feeling... it holds words truly spoken from deep inside that no one, and I mean no one (not even me sometimes) but Allah Subhanahu wa tala knows...

Anyways – I came across the below. It’s a note that I'd saved when I was on the verge of finally donning the Hijab. I found myself wanting to do it and ready to do it, but subconsciously delaying it and didn’t know why... I had all these reasons that I thought were the cause for the delay but figured there was something more to it as when I questioned those reasons... they just weren’t valid...

Here are my thoughts from 59 days ago...

“Why don't I wear Hijab??

I don't know. I think for a number of reasons which I will now try to work out...

But before doing so I want to express my how much I actually want to begin wearing the Hijab... So why exactly DO I want to observe Hijab?

First and foremost I think... as it’s a commandment of my Lord. Plain and simple I guess... He's the one who created the heavens and the earth, the universe. I'm Allah's Creation - He’s the one I belong to. The Almighty creator, my owner... so I should do what my creator wants of me. Like you obey your parents cos temporarily they are over you, surely I should obey the one who made me? If something belongs to you, you want to do with it what you wish. You want it to work to please you and service you as you want it to...

In observing hijab, I want to show my faith. I'm a Muslim and I'm proud of that. I want people to know I'm a Muslim and I believe in my Allah. I love my religion and when you love something you want to show it off for all to see...

I want to observe veil to safeguard me from unwanted situations and comments. I don't want to be leered at. I don't want to have to deal with awkward comments from unwanteds... Sometimes I can't go into certain stores such as Footlocker or the menswear departments cos these places are full if pervy male sales assistants.. Walking through makes me feel so uncomfortable cos I feel they're all watching and perving -even on a rough day!... Astagfirullah.


Will I feel the need to conform and dress with the right shoes? The right handbag? The accessories? Possibly – just to show my love for fashion and clothes and that I love the latest looks...

So why DONT I wear Hijab yet?

Maybe I'm not ready to let go, not ready to let go of what I know maybe? It will mean changing everything physically visual about me. Mainly - my clothes.

Clothes are a part of me and in a sense changing that will be changing my personality. Changing the way I dress... Clothes make me feel good. If I'm dressed in the way that I like, that I’m happy with and comfortable with - I feel confident and I feel happy. If I'm not 100% happy, I feel rubbish... The other girls always look amazing, I’ll feel soooo crap in comparison..

Maybe thinking about clothes making me feel confident is not the right way. How will dressing in Hijab make me feel confident? What confidence will Hijab give me?? What will I get from wearing Hijab - increased imaan inshallah...?

Am I ready for the questions people will ask? Yes. I can give them the answers above as to why I observe veil. Though- they won't really understand...

How will I handle the reactions? I don’t like the attention being on me and can’t be bothered with having people make exclamations of my decision and asking me questions why I’ve done it... is it bad that I can’t be bothered to explain...? its dawah... maybe it may be cos I don’t feel I have enough knowledge to do it justice?? Yeah I can explain why I’m doing but will I be able to make them see the real beauty of wearing Hijab...

Am I avoiding the confrontation and all the limelight being on me...? That would be the worst thing - all eyes on me... I dont want to have to explain to people feel like I'm put on the spot..

I was born a Muslim, I believe in Allah and the Quran. My book tells me to cover as a commandment from my lord. Will people thin think I’m a ‘Bible Basher’? Will they think I’m a dork for being into religion?

It’s a commandment from my Lord - People will accept that. But I don't want them to change towards me... I don't want them to think I'm being forced to do it, or oppressed or anything else like that ...so maybe, the way I dress will reflect that...?

But then why should I care what anyone else thinks??

Why do I care? I shouldn't cos whatever they think I will continue love my religion and that's all matters... The only one that I need to be worried about answering to? The Almighty Allah...”

Subhanallah! – all those thoughts and feelings I’d been feeling were so overwhelming!

Allhumdulillah – I finally put on the Hijab on Monday March 2nd 2009... And after all that, the first day at work? It really wasn’t all that bad – in fact it was one the MOST memorable...

Amazing in fact...

But that’s another post soon to be Insh’Allah...
= )

--Posted From My iPhone --

Sunday, 12 April 2009

I got your back...

“Woman was made from the rib of man,
She was not created from his head to top him,
Nor form his feet to be stepped upon,
She was made from his side to be close to him,
From beneath his arm to be protected by him,
Near his heart to be loved by him”

Such a beautiful quote!

I stumbled across this earlier today and was left thinking ‘Wow!’...

I was listening to a lecture earlier in the week on the creation of Prophet Adam (Alayhis Salam) and was reminded that Huwa (Peace be upon Her) was created from Adam (Alayhis Salam) so my enquiring little mind then wanted to research a little further into this...

I came across the following hadith;

Abu Huraira narrated that the Prophet said: “...Treat women well and with kindness, for woman was created from the rib, and the most crooked part of a rib is its upper part. And if you were to straighten it, you would break it ; and if you were to leave it, it would remain crooked. So treat women well...”
(Sahih Al -Bukhari)

I was a bit confused as to the meaning of this hadith – what did it mean exactly? What relation did the bent rib have to do with the how Islam teaches you to treat women?

It wasn’t until I googled further I found my answers...!

What was interesting to see was how Christian followers had taken this hadith in a negative way and illustrated this hadith to mean Islam views women as being created ‘crooked’ or ‘bent’ by nature therefore – defective!

APPARENTLY - In attempting straighten this rib would break it and as woman also, is crooked like the rib – it would be pointless in trying to do so...

I’m now left thinking WTH?!?!! Ok so I know that the hadith won’t mean anything so negative for Islam isn’t a religion that’s unfair or unreasonable – but what interested me is how it was taken in such a bipolar way! Anyways...

The Noble Quran states:

“We have indeed created man in the best of moulds,”
(Surah Al Tin – 95:4)


“It is He [Allah] who made good everything He created”
(Surah Al Sajda – 32:7)

This hadith has clearly been taken in the wrong context and is often used to promote the view that Islam treats us women as inferiors and unequal.... A true believer strives to live every part of his live by the Quran and Sunnah so any one anyone who has studied or even has the slightest knowledge of these is fully aware that this is so not what Islam says about women and the role they play.

In fact it's quite contradictory!

Women are regarded highly and far superior in Islam as some would think. And the hadith above would no way entertain any other notion...

Women have an exceptionally important place in Islam which also holds a woman in high esteem. Her importance as a mother and a wife has been clearly stated by Prophet Muhammad (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam);

Once a person asked the prophet who deserves the best care from me? The prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) said your mother (3 times), then your father and then your closest relatives.

He (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) also said "Fear Allah (Subhanahu wa Taala) in respect of women; and, the best of you are they who behave best to their wives; and, a Muslim must not hate his wife, and if he is displeased with one bad quality in her, let him be pleased with one that is good; the more civil and kind a Muslim is to his wife, the more perfect in faith he is."

Ok so what exactly does this Hadith in question speak of? The wording of the same hadith as narrated by Imam Muslim in his Sahih, which reads:

Abu Huraira narrated that the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) said: “The woman was created from a rib. She will not be straight according to your way. If you want to enjoy her, you will have to enjoy her with her twist [crookedness]. And if you try to straighten her, you would break her: and breaking her is divorcing her"

The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) states that woman is not ‘’...straight according to your way...’’

So in other words refers to man and woman being different in the way in that they were created. The mind of the man works in a way that is different to that of the woman and thus leads to differences in the way in which they think; and also behave. It could also be said that to woman, the man is also ‘bent’ or ‘crooked’ compared to her.

(I couldn’t help but laugh here!)

The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) then goes onto say that do not try and change her inherent nature but to work with her and any ‘crookedness’ that may be ... This means that she may not be as the man may wish in some aspects but to accept her fully as Allah, Al-Khaliq, has made her.

“O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should you treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the dowry you have given them - except when they have become guilty of open lewdness. On the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike something and God will bring about through it a great deal of good”
(Surah An Nisa – 4:19)

The hadith finishes with explaining in trying to straighten the rib will result in it breaking... So in trying to straighten out the woman will result in breaking her also - and the way in which to break a woman...? Divorce...

The woman is like the protection like the rib is to the heart; and the same way, the woman is the protection to the man. For the protection for the heart to remain, there needs to be an initial protection to the rib as if any harm were to come to the rib, this would leave the heart unprotected and vulnerable...

Subhanallah - a very soft and kind Hadith which illustrates the affection that should be between man and woman whilst also teaches us how a wife and husband should compliment each other...

Truly such a beautiful analogy – which I pray that I too, will be blessed with one day Insha’Allah.

Keep me in your duas,
Fi amanillah

Sunday, 5 April 2009

To Allah we belong and unto Him we shall return...

So Tuesday saw the 26th birthday of my beautiful brother Imran.

26 years... Mashallah - a grown man.

I haven’t seen Imran for just over six years now. I wonder how he is. I wonder where he is. I wonder if he was here, what he'd be doing.

I imagine he's grown a beard - and expect he looks beautiful. He's stunning as it is, exceptionally handsome Allhumdulillah and the beard MashAllah would add perfectly to his innocent beauty...

Humble, sweet and sincere are my thoughts of him...

Those qualities radiate from the last picture I have of him. His face-beautiful, golden coloured, rosebud lips, thick eyebrows and a sombre expression.

Who knew?

The Quran reads:
“Verily the knowledge of the Hour is with Allah (alone). It is He Who sends down rain, and He Who knows what is in the wombs. Nor does anyone know what it is that he will earn on the morrow: nor does anyone know in what land he is to die. Verily with Allah is full knowledge and He is acquainted (with all things).”
(Surah Luqman – 31:34)

Ibn Kathir’s tafsir tells us that only Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala knows of the final hour. The timing of the final hour is one of 5 things that have not been revealed to us and are only known to Allah, Al Aleem ; The All-knowing, The Knowledgeable and The One nothing is absent from.

One day a man came to the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) and said “O Messenger of Allah, when will the Hour come' He said the one who is asked about it does not know more than the one who is asking”

When the rain is to fall... What may be in the womb... That which man is due tomorrow and the land in which he is to die is only known by one who is the all knowing Creator.

Although Allah does not will for the soul be taken in a particular land, it says in Hadith narrated by Usamah bin Zayd: If Allah wants to take a person's soul in a particular land, He will be give him a reason to go there.

Subhanallah! Who BUT Allah Subhanahu as tala knew?

Your appointed time...

“But to no soul will Allah grant respite when the time appointed (for it) has come: and Allah is well-acquainted with (all) that ye do.”
(Surah Al Munafiqoon – 63:11)

“It is He Who has created you from dust, then from a sperm-drop, then from a leech-like clot; then does He get you out (into the light) as a child: then lets you (grow and) reach your age of full strength; then lets you become old― though of you there are some who die before; - and lets you reach a Term appointed: in order that you may learn wisdom.”
(Surah Al Ghafir – 40:67)

February 18th 2003.

The Angel of death came to you with a duty to be fulfilled. That was your time brother - THAT was your time. There was no way in which you would have been spared of this and your appointed Angel would only leave once your soul was taken and the duty was complete.

“He is Supreme over His creatures, and He appoints guards to protect you. When the appointed time of death comes to any of you, our messengers put him to death without delay.”
(Surah Al Anam – 6:61)

Blessed with the honour...

There was something of a negative feeling about the trip that would lead to your demise.

I had so much love for you and loved time on the weekends with just us four...

It was unexplainable but I didn’t want you to go. My heart didn’t want you to go. My heart didn’t want you to be away from us and leave us here...

But you did... you went and left us here without out you for good...

What was the message that Allah had sent in taking you from us?
What lessons were we to learn from losing you...?
How was this to make us grow?

We were truly tested with the most precious and beautiful gem to us all.

It has been authentically related that the Prophet, upon Him be peace said:
“Also a martyr is he who is killed in a strange land far away from his hearth and kin.”
(Narrated from Ibn `Abbas by Ibn Majah)

Other hadiths have also related: "The death of the stranger is shahada" (ie he who dies in a foreign land) as Narrated from Ibn `Abbas and Ibn `Umar by al-Daraqutni and a third wording, "Whoever dies a stranger, dies a shaheed" as narrated from Anas and Abu Hurayra.

Imam al-Bukhari and Muslim, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) mentioned five types of martyrs:

· One who dies in a plague
· One who dies of intestinal ailments
· One who dies of drowning
· One who dies under a collapsed building
· One who dies as a martyr in jihad

Imam Ahmad, Abu Dawud and others stated that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “There are seven martyrs”. Having said this, he added the following to the list mentioned above:

· One who dies in a fire
· A woman who dies during child-birth

A third report states that the Prophet (Peace and blessings be upon him) said:

· Whoever dies while defending his own possessions is a martyr
· Whoever dies defending his own person is a martyr
· Whoever dies guarding his own faith is a martyr
· Whoever dies fighting in order to defend his own family is also a martyr

The shaheed are of two categories – the first is he who dies in Jihad in the way of Allah and the second he who dies from something that is not his own making.

There is a small difference in the 2 types of Shaheed – he who is slain in the way of Allah Subhanahu wa taala does not need to be bathed before burial as from the moment of bloodshed all his past sins are forgiven. The second type of shaheed is not thought of as a true shaheed in this world as such but receives the rewards and blessing of the shaheed in there hereafter and therefore still need to be bathed before burial.

According to Imam an-Nawawi, “The second category of martyrs will receive rewards of martyrdom, and yet unlike the martyrs of jihad, they will be bathed (before burial) and prayed over.”

Subhanallah - Truly an honour to possess and something of a comfort for the immense loss experienced. The shaheed is considered one whose place in Paradise is promised according to the below verse in the Quran:

“Think not of those who are slain in Allah's way as dead. Nay, they live, finding their sustenance in the presence of their Lord; They rejoice in the bounty provided by Allah. And with regard to those left behind, who have not yet joined them (in their bliss), the (martyr's) glory in the fact that on them is no fear, nor have they (cause to) grieve.”
(Al Baqarah – 3:169-173)

Taken together, numerous verses from the Quran convey the undeniable message that for those shaheed, there is a unique and immediate reward. In the divine existence there will be six qualities from which they are blessed with:

· He will be forgiven from the first moment his blood is spilled;
· He shall see his seat in Paradise and be protected against the punishment of the grave;
· He shall be safe from the greatest terror [the rising of the dead];
· He shall be given the crown of dignity, one ruby of which is worth more than the entire world and its contents;
· He shall be coupled with seventy-two spouses from the wide-eyed Hurians of Paradise;
· He shall be granted to intercede for seventy of his members of his family as narrated Abu Darda.

It has reported that when man passes away in a land other than his birthplace or residence his grave is widened from the place of his demise as far unto the place of his residence...

The bodies of common people decay in their graves with the passage of time, whilst the bodies of the Prophets (Alaihi as-salaam) are preserved as a sign of honour. It is also known by observation that bodies of some martyrs are preserved.

The life in Barzakh…

The stroke of your nose... the touch of your shoulder... the feel of your feet... Your flawless skin - Reliving those painful moments ill never forget...

Words simply just don’t carry enough meaning or importance to be able to express the deep and often complex, feelings and emotions experienced... There really are very few words that truly can put this into words...

"And say not of those who are slain in the Way of God: 'They are dead.' Nay, they are living, Though you perceive it not."
(Al Baqarah – 2:154)

Barzakh is an Arabic word derived from the Persian word “Pardah.” Linguistically, “Barzakh” means a veil, barrier or partition between two things.

It is the stage between this world and the other world - from the time of death until the time of Resurrection. Thus, whoever dies enters the Barzakh. There have been many different definitions of Barzakh but there is one underlying similarity between all: that the soul after having separated from its worldly body, enters into a realm behind which there is a barrier forbidding any return.

Souls dwell on different levels in the state of existence known as the Barzakh, the partition between this life and the Hereafter.

Some souls will be in the highest ranking, such as the souls of the Prophets (peace be upon them). Even they will be in different rankings with respect to one another, as Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) saw them during his Night Journey.

Other souls will be encased within green birds and will be able to go wherever they please in Paradise. These are the souls of some of the martyrs who hold the second highest ranking in the Barzakh

Ka’ab Ibn Malik related that the Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu Alaihi wa-Sallam) said: “The believer’s soul is a bird which feeds upon the fruits of the trees of Paradise, until Allah returns it to its body on the Day he is resurrected.”

Far superior luxuries will be enjoyed in the Barzakh than those found in the world that we can only but imagine of.

The latest kicks, the high tech gadgets the little indulgences of life..
I often think about those little moments in which your presence has been missed - the family gatherings, Birthdays, Eid...

I think about those sweet moments in life you've not been there to share with us - vacations, the next generation and family moments but mostly - you're the one missing from the photo of all the boys, the boys that you loved to be around and so dearly looked up to...

I remember a photo being taken on Eid last year. As all the boys gathered, Mash'Allah- I noticed everyone was there, uncles, cousins, the kids - Everyone. Sat watching from the sofa I looked to see there was a space unfilled - the portrait was missing someone... What would have been the perfect portrait, was missing you. Missing you, one person amongst all those that most loved you

I remember it clearly. A poignant moment - captured for life...

You’ve missed so much but I wonder what it is you may have you been spared of?
Have you been spared of something so wicked in this life that is far greater than what you have missed?

There are of course conditions to which level of Barzakh you will reside of course, not all will be blessed with the highest eligible ranking of course and those of the unbelievers who chose to ignore will suffer in the lowest ranks and some will even remain on t his earth due to neglect of good deeds.

“Rejoicing in what Allah has given them out of His grace and they rejoice for the sake of those who, (being left) behind them, have not yet joined them, that they shall have no fear, nor shall they grieve."
(Al Baqarah – 2:170)

The Ayahs and Hadith are all so beautiful and relate so well to our loss – I often wonder had we known these then, had our knowledge been as it is now, had we had strong conviction in Allah Subhanahu Wa Taala, would this have eased the pain in our hearts that had been shattered to pieces?

6 years later, we have found our own ways of dealing with our enormous loss. You’ve cried so much that you get sick of crying, and after a while you think how could you possibly cry anymore?

I don’t think any of us will ever get over the loss of losing him and as for when we get tearful, I know I for certain may shed tears but never let myself truly let out what I’m feeling inside. Ive cried him a river and honestly, dont think I'll ever stop...

“Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi rajioon.”
(Al Baqarah – 2:156)

Just another little test and tribulation...

Allhumdulillah – Truly all praise and all thanks is to Allah Subhanahu wa Tala.

Asalaamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu